The headline in the Sunday Province paper read:  Failure isn’t such a bad thing, study reveals  (Linda Blair, January 28, 2018 p.B6).  Really?  Isn’t failure damaging to your self-esteem and sense of self-worth?  Isn’t it something that can damage you for life?  It seems that researchers have discovered that this isn’t necessarily so. Our failures can help us succeed – if we approach them with a certain attitude.

Research out of Turkey, Belgium and Germany has offered some interesting things to ponder.  It seems that in work and educational settings, people seem to be more cautious, more risk-adverse and more careful not to fail  The emphasis is more often on achieving results rather than on learning and becoming wiser. Students afraid to fail were more cautious, more likely to set goals that allowed them to feel better about themselves (easy to achieve), rather than pursue new interests or enhance personal development.

Sim Sitkin at Duke University looked at a number of businesses, some with repeated success and others with failures.  He concluded that in business, continual success is associated with growing complacency, decreased attentiveness and less interest in inventing new strategies.  Failure, on the other hand, is associated with increased attention, a search for better and more innovative strategies and as a result, a wider palette of solutions for solving relevant problems.

A friend reminded me today of a story attributed to Thomas Edison.
The short version of this story: Someone asked Edison why it took him 10,000 failures before he perfected the light bulb.  Edison replied that it took him 9,999 times to improve on his design til perfected!

As long as we can learn from our failure, we have the capacity to create a better, more successful path for ourselves.  Failure helps us to learn about resiliency – that quality which helps us rise above our current situation to attain new heights and insights. From this learning, we can create a new way of doing and being that improves upon the present.

By failing, we have a chance to improve and strengthen our resolve for what really matters.  We don’t give up on ourselves, but we might give up on the path we have taken. It wasn’t necessarily you as a person who failed, but it was your approach that didn’t work. Figure out what was wrong with the approach and you are on your way towards solving it. Failure helps us be clear, creative and active – not passive – with our situation and choices.  Failure gives us a reason to design, re-design and try another approach. And Learn!

As long as we continue to learn from our mistakes, we improve our chances for future competency and success. When failure presents itself, we come to learn more about ourselves, our abilities, our knowledge and our limitations. We can evolve and expand. This is something we can build upon.  It puts control for our future in our hands – not those of someone else.

Yes, change demands a degree of risk.  But by not risking a change in our beliefs, attitudes or actions, we increase our chances of failing again.  Why would we want to do that to ourselves?

During November, we have opportunities for Remembrance.  By definition, this is a time of acknowledging and reflecting upon the past.  People, places, pets, objects, situations from our past come forth to be acknowledged and “remembered” apotheke-zag.de.

The month starts with All Saints Day and the Feast of the Dead.  At this time, it is believed that the veil separating the living and the dead is parted ever so briefly, offering opportunity for the exchange of guidance and prophecy.  On the 11th month, on the 11th day at the 11th hour,  we “remember” those who defended our country and its rights and freedoms. Some came back, some did not. And some came back damaged on many levels from the ordeal.  At the end of the month, our American friends have their Thanksgiving Day. On this day, they reflect upon their lives and give thanks.  Reflections of one’s life require “remembrance” and acknowledgement.

Some people question the importance of remembrance.  It’s history – old news. What is done, is done.  So move on.  Some people don’t wish to remember their past as it holds too many painful memories; they block everything from their past.  Some people tightly hold onto the past memories because they were the best of times; they live in the past instead of the present.  But there is a difference between memories and remembrance.

Whereas memories hold the thought and emotion of the past, remembrance takes that thought and emotion and offers reflection and understanding of how it influenced our life and  life choices since. This is how we can integrate the great and not so great moments in our lives.  By remembering, we can learn.  By remembering, we offer ourselves a chance to not be tied to the past, yet allow the past to be acknowledged for what it was.

The past happened – that can’t be changed.  But our view and reaction to the past can be changed.  But not by denying or clinging to it.  When we face it for what it was and realize that we can choose a more self-helpful way of responding to it, the memory becomes a remembrance.  The emotional power a memory holds over us is softened.  Over time, this emotion is gently released.  And we are left with a remembrance of that memory.  And its lesson.

It is helpful to remember our history. It offers roots and context to our life story. But it isn’t our whole story. We must live in the present.  Having remembrances lets us realize where we came from and where we are now.  Should we need to course-correct in a direction more in alignment with our dreams and purpose, it is our choice to do so.

Remembrance and Memories – crucial steps in our evolution.

While attending to the usual business year-end inventory count, I was struck with how this process can be a metaphor for many things. Who knew that by counting inventory stock and reorganizing it in one’s work space, many other lessons and comparisons could be made?  It wasn’t something I went looking for, but I’m glad I found it!

The process of “taking inventory” is to note what you actually have in stock and how that compares with what you are supposed to have in stock.  Those of you familiar with the process know that what the inventory sheet says you are supposed to have and what you actually physically see and count can be very different.  What you think you have now, is shown to not be true. There is a discrepancy!

Doing an inventory count is a messy business.  Everything gets moved, piled up and put out of its normal place – complete disruption.  A great term to describe the scene is “chaos”.  Nothing is left untouched. But from this chaos came great ideas and new ways of looking at things. Here’s how it went.

As I went through each area and item, I found myself asking many questions:  Why was I holding onto these things?  What purpose did they have?  Are these things that I will likely use with clients over the next year?  Are these things I would use for myself over the next year?  Does keeping this feel like a burden or a blessing?  I found myself being brutal with letting go of things that no longer served the Centre, its clients or me. Don’t look back or second guess – just toss  it!  And those things that were still purposeful and meaningful were given extra attention and care.

Once I had only what was purposeful and meaningful, I cleaned and rearranged the store and the storage areas to be more organized and user friendly.  When all was done, there was a sense of peace and accomplishment that arose from the chaos. I looked around and thought, ” I like this now!”  Everything felt fresh and with renewed energy.

Once I finished the inventory, I realized that life is a lot like this process. The phrases,  “taking stock of a situation”, “counting your blessings”, “spring cleaning” and “analyze this!” had more relevance.  All of these phrases ask us to think about our self and our situation. We ask questions such as: “Is this a blessing or a burden for me?”  or  “Is this for my Highest Good?” We may uncover uncomfortable or painful aspects that momentarily send us for a loop (chaos?).  But after a while, and with focused intention and action, we are able to understand what it is that works for us and what needs to be tweaked.  Then we take action and tweak!

The treasure at the end of this process is a sense of personal accomplishment and satisfaction. The change we make helps us feel good about ourselves and our situation. Improvement, satisfaction, accomplishment, joy and Highest Good.
All from willing to engage with doing an “Inventory”.